Towards the end of April I came back home with the mind of being a full time stay at home daughter with the hope to make up for all those years I was in boarding school and at college. Then, I would come home for a month at most at least three times a year and literally be a couch potato. I wouldn't watch much television but I would spend hours on the phone - my typical punishment was getting my cellphone privilege taken away. I did no work around the house I hid behind my books - cooking, laundry, baking, cleaning - none of that! I was pretty much a tomboy, I hated all that girls were expected to love. Even now being all girly ain't natural to me - make up, handbags (I do sling bags at least), heels, dressing up (I at least put effort now), showing emotions (I suck at this, I often tell my friends that I'm not romantic but a close friend assured me that it will change once I get a hubby - only time will tell).
However, one woman trait that didn't skip me is crying, this is normally when I have to leave home. I cried on my first day of pre-school, primary school, the first four years of high school, all my three years of college, more tears expected when I have to give up being a MAPOSA (if the Lord won't be here by then). The thought of marriage makes me sigh, I sometimes wonder if I will give up my surname or just add my hubby's one after mine. I wonder if I would be able to sacrifice or pray as much as my mom does. I wonder if my hubby would be able to love me and treat me the way my dad does to my mom. And our children, with the way I enjoy crying will I be able to stop that baby from crying? My mom told us that my older brother would cry so much, so much so that, she would join him - I see myself doing that too. Oh hubby, I hope you will be able to handle us both!
Back to being a stay at home daughter, I am grateful that I got this opportunity to serve my family at home. It has been such a great pleasure. In these few months I have learnt a lot of life time lessons from cooking, baking, gardening, cleaning the house, cooking with fire in a smokey hut kitchen, laundry - hand washing, loving and caring for others, tolerating your loved ones, knowing when to remain quiet (I was once a word vomit master), reading for knowledge not just to get by tests and exams, and many others. I have had days when I was just over being home, when I just wanted to stay in bed all day, when I thought this staying at home thing ain't for me and there are some days when I wish I could stay home until marriage then be a homemaker until Jesus comes. But as my prayer is daily - for not my will but God's will to be done.
I know that just sounded like a 'funeral speech' - as if my stay at home daughter days are over and I am now reflecting on them. (Disclaimer: they aren't over yet but will soon be.)
Whaaaaaaaat? it's 05:42 now! I can't believe I have been up for a lil less than 4 hours doing a whole bunch of NOTHING! I sure hope I will be able to do the same in Law School. Oh and Yes! my hunger is gone.