Tuesday, 15 July 2014

Why I wouldn't have my male friends visit me?

Family background: before you think I am sexist or anything random like that, please bare in mind I am my father's only daughter, my mother's only side kick, my brothers' only sister. In my immediate Maposa clan there are only two girls and a gazillion boys, making me the only other niece and the oldest one for that matter. If you haven't already worked out the Math, that just spells out - Over Protection at it's highest degree! And guess what? I totally understand, in fact, I would be worried if I had it any other way.

Past experience: Once upon a time I had a friend visit me, it was some time around mid-day so I thought it wouldn't be a big deal. Then my dad came back home and found me talking to this friend; firstly he was a guy, secondly he had a car , thirdly I was meant to be studying for my final exams and here I was busy messing around outside the gate with a BOY! I can't even imagine what was going through my dad's mind. Surprisingly enough, he didn't say anything to me but that night my older brother and my mom had a billion questions to answer of something they didn't know about. I got the longest lecture ever from my mom, my dad didn't talk to me for a month or so, though it was an innocent visit I decided NEVER again will I allow such!

That experience made me want to be super transparent to my family. I tell my parents everything. Yes! even about that guy trying to make a move. Crazy huh? The craziest was when I cc-d my dad in an email conversation of a guy who unbearably thought I was his wife yet he had no guts to talk to my father and Yes! Daddy didn't disappoint - he never does! My little brother literally knows every detail of my life (by default). His daily routine - before he goes to school he takes my iPad checks my email and Facebook to see who I was talking to and about what, after school he does the same thing and randomly during the day. Funny enough, I don't mind! I have nothing to hide.

Warning to Future Hubby: We are definitely not going to have a secret affair. It's not possible. Flirting, dirty talk, touching, hugging - none of that. Your visits to my parent's house - our home, will not be unannounced. Please please please before you come to me may you kindly go to my father first - he is not scary, he is unlike most fathers, he is a cool and very quiet guy, ONLY if you have pure motives because he is also a no nonsense guy. How to do that? - Only God can show you!

My male friends - if you want to see me, we will meet at church. I will definitely be there every Sabbath, the whole day even. If you want to come to my house then bring along a whole bunch of girls - avoiding any appearance of evil. In exceptional cases arrangements can be made - please don't use this against me!


  1. I very much agree! Love your warning to future hubby! I feel the same way. He needs to go to my dad. My dad is God's protection and authority over me, so if a guy came directly to me he would be going around God's order. Sadly guys are no longer taught that you need to be respectful and go to the father first. Thanks for sharing!

  2. You are blessed with an amazing family - wow a brother who checks your e-mails!!!
    I am your neighbor at So Much at Home blog