During Courtship and Marriage talks, I have heard a couple of sisters saying "there aren't any guys in the church", but I never really understood what they meant because I would always look around and see a whole bunch of SINGLE males [we all have those blonde moments].
However upon reflection and research, I finally understood what the sisters really meant. Initially I thought it was just an excuse to justify 'unequally yoking' (2 Corinthians 6:14) BUT it's not. Yes there are guys in the church but very few of them are really different to [or let's say better than] those who aren't in the church.
Being the person that I am, with the principles and convictions I live by, I have had to 'red-flag' a lot of guys for no other reason than that, they were not of the same faith. The guy might have been all perfect, all right and even willing to join my faith BUT I believe a person must only change their faith out of their OWN conviction and not for another person [dating evangelism or convert and marry - none of that]. Sometimes I look back at what could have been, sometimes it hurts letting go of that person, sometimes I even wish I wasn't a bible believing Christian. But I always say to myself "Nontie! we are here and not there, and what the bible says is what has to be done."
Now to turn to the guys in the church, [Disclaimer: this doesn't apply to all but a few I have come across]. Okay, so some will portray themselves as 'Angels', they will sell dreams and leave you believing that they can't even hurt a fly. Then some few weeks, yea months, you will realize the brother had the 'sharing principle' over grilled in them. Some will even recite the quote that says - "to trifle with hearts is a crime of no small magnitude in the sight of a holy God" (from the book Adventist Home page 57.1 by Ellen G White) and still go on to 'emotionally torture' you. Some will have outrageous demands that will leave you wondering if they even read their bible or know what the 7th commandment says.
Moral of the Story: to my fellow sisters - as much as we might think or believe that there aren't any good guys in the church and go on to look else, remember God will not lower his standards to accommodate us. To my brothers - may you pray that your conduct does not push a sister away from God's word and plans. Unequally yoking has deep consequences!