Tuesday, 24 November 2015

Only Girl Syndrome

Backgroud: As a little girl, my one wish was to have a big sister. I imagined how it would be like having someone to set a standard for me, to advise me and to do “whatever sisters do” with. I would always think of my non-existent sister every time I was tasked to do chores (I still do). I would imagine how fun it would have been if I had someone to help. But with time, I got over my imaginations and accepted the fact that big sister wasn't there.

My experience as the only girl in the family is great! I get more than enough attention (if I'm not up early enough, it doesn't go without notice). If I'm not in the kitchen when my mom gets home from work there will be a lot of explaining to do. If my mom isn't home, then I have to make sure that everyone is well fed and happy. (I am also known as - the second mom.)

However the not so great side is being mislabeled. Most people’s first impression of me is that I am a spoilt brat (spoilt brat even sounds like my middle name now). My background and upbringing is quite unique from most people. Being the only girl and middle child, I grew up in an environment where I set my own standards without pressure of meeting any expectations. (There was never anyone my parents could compare me with.)

I might appear like that child that gets everything they want whenever they ask. But trust me, everything I have I had to work for (one way or the other). My mom is a bit lenient on this, but with my dad, you have to give a reason why you deserve whatever you are asking for. (Imagine finding a good reason why you need $1 calling credit or airtime, which is not talking to friends).

Some might take my not being a fan of crowds as a sign of being a snob. But the truth is, I was never allowed to leave home and go anywhere as I please. The first time I ever went for a movie was when I was in University. I remember one time when I asked my dad (way in advance) to go for ice cream with my friends, he didn't say yes or no. But the next day he came home with four or five 5 litre tubs of ice cream (judging from that, my answer was a big No). I asked to go for a movie once and I was asked what movie I wanted to watch that wasn't showing on DSTV. I never attended any parties. I have never been to any sleep over. I was never exposed to most places where young people hang out. (hence my idea of going out is CHURCH!)

I whine a lot! But that doesn't mean I want anyone to deal with my problems. My dad tolerates my whining (never my mom) but his policy is “I can tolerate your whining as long as you realise that after your ‘whining show’ you are going to get the work done.” (When you hear me whine, I probably miss my dad, nothing much, and you are not expected to do anything about it.)

Moral of the Story: It's always good to first understand why someone does certain things or acts in a particular manner before you can label them (if you really have to). Heaven will definitely not have people who are just like you in every aspect, so practice to be more accommodative and show a great deal of tolerance to those who are different from you. 

1 comment:

  1. Thanks for linking up at Mondays @ Soul Survival! Blessings!